Tuesday 22 September 2009

GETTING YOUR PRIORITIES RIGHT


Don’t you just love the working classes; they do the jobs us educated and posh people cannot be bothered to get up in the morning for. Take for instance Rigg, my butler, who has just brought me a steaming cup of Lapsang Souchong, together with the afternoons post.

The usual drivel prevails; begging letters, council attendance allowance cheques, Netto coupons. The only thing of any note is my invitation to the annual Market Traders Week Europe Congress. This year’s bash will be held at London’s Victoria Park Plaza YMCA on 17th November. At a cost of £6.99, the daylong event will look at issues affecting us market traders, particularly the thorny matter of counterfeit TV remotes. The guest list looks pretty impressive, with Sir Rodney Trotter rumoured to be making an appearance. I have been asked to give a talk on the subject of “Sky Remotes and the problems associated with rain damage”. Spiffing.

The only fly in this succulent ointment is that the bash clashes with one of my council romps (The Overview and Scrutiny Coordinating and Call In Committee).

What to do dear reader, what to do?

Who shall have the pleasure of the “Presence of the Posh”?

On one hand I have the tedious prospect of sitting in a room with a group of Labour councillors, who frankly smell of pease pudding, whippets and fish and chips (and that’s just Gussy Gibson). On the other side of the coin I could have a day in the metropolis, lashings of Bollinger and more free Space Raiders and pickled onion flavoured Monster Munch than is humanly possible to eat, and all for £6.99!

Now that’s what I call an investment.

Money well spent dear boy, money well spent.

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