After two nights living in the wilderness (I camped on the first night with the pikey’s next to the A19) I arrived at the Voko Reservation.
I wasn’t there to chew the buffalo fat.
With my best Clint Eastwood grin, I muttered “The names Dave, Rodeo Dave, and I need hair”.
I was ushered into a big tipi, removed of my beaver jacket (it was split) and purple checked shirt, and sat down in front of a mirror.
Fellow cowboys, from that moment my life changed.
Red Indian Squaw’s are internationally known for their ability to restore balding thatches, but they are not normally known for their beauty. To be frank, they normally look like Cury’s wife and smell like McWoody’s sporran. However, the vision that greeted me transgressed the standard association of a likeness to a decaying musk rat – this Indian crimper was blessed with good looks, no facial hair and yes dear reader, she had all her own teeth!
I was in love, and this time I didn’t have to pay for the privilege!
After a meagre two hair transplants (pubic buffalo hair is the best), three blue rinses and a full hour of deep root Brylcreem application, I had moved into “Second Hand Wife Of Fire-Fighter”s tipi.
Whilst our cultural differences worried me, I sought solace in my well accumulated knowledge of second hand goods (who can forget my experience with Sky Remote’s).
Whilst the love between a sheriff and his Squaw may transgress these boundaries, how would they survive against the accusations of “third hand goods”?
Like a redneck taking a leak into the sunset, all will be revealed later!
COMING SOON
WHO ACTUALLY OWNS “SECOND HAND WIFE OF FIRE FIGHTERS” TIPI – AN IN DEPTH REPORT
WHAT IS THE KELCO INDIAN DEFINITION OF THIRD HAND GOODS?
ARE BOXER SHORTS A COWBOY FASHION ACCESSORY?
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